when i first got turned onto creating
this wordpress site
i was afraid naked too exposed
everything i had previously written
in this lifetime had been hidden away
secreted into books, notebooks and journals …
they were safe out of a world’s sight
leaving me out of the possibility
of the critics’ harsh scrawl..
yet, the joke remains that no one could be a greater critic
of my work than me…
so, when i began this, i tried to write everyday
as both exercise and exorcism…
every day i came here and let the words flow
but i did write
whether i had anything to say or not
the words flowed and often what came out
shocked even me
both the good and the not so great..
at least it was there
words on the page..
then, after europe, my words took
leave
took their own vacation
all of the art entwined and morphed
into daily letters to an artist friend
yet in spite of that, i still felt that i was leaving
the art and my self behind…
and in that shadowdance became intimidating
a place to fear
a place that demanded something of me
when there was nothing to produce
except a false forced language
it became a place easier to stay away from..
and so i did….for months and months
its always interesting to face your fears
of failure of loss of art
so with tentative and wary steps
i stand again at the threshold
wondering what might be
left to say…
Wondering what
Might be left to say
Is the way to art
xxxooo m